Afternoon naps

Well, it seems I have yet to master the art of these, despite many years of trying.

I have just indulged in what I'd hoped would be a therapeutic and revitalising snooze, only to wake up reeling from stomach cramps (I was lying in too awkward a position), a criminally runny nose (I'd left the window open) and a mighty sense of dislocation stemming from the fact it's now a lot later in the day than I'd planned. I guess it's not until I'm old enough to partake in them regularly that I will know the correct techniques and devices for ensuring the ideal afternoon nap. By which point they will have ceased to possess any novelty, of course, and what was once an occasional boon will have turned into a boring ritual.

This isn't right at all. You go to sleep to escape the complications of the day, not to end up facing more of them. Though maybe not finding yourself wanting to go to sleep in the day at all would be a start.